In Our Last İssue, Journalist Esther Walker Admitted Being a Wife Could be Claustrophobic We Asked Her Husband The Times Columnist Giles Coren Once Dubbed Britain’s Angriest Man for His Response
BSOMYWIFETHINKS MARRIAGE CAN E ‘CLAUSTROPHOBIC
Hat’s nice. I suppose you’ve got to admire her honesty. But you might also be wondering how her comments make me feel. And the answer is, they don’t make me feel. I’m her husband. If I went around having feelings all over the place, there would be no room for hers. And then where would she be? More claustrophobic than ever. If I were merely her boyfriend (which I once was, obviously) it would be diferent. I might choose to feel hurt. I might take her statement out of context, rant and rave, smash up the furniture, back her into a corner and scream, ‘Claustrophobic? What do you mean, claustrophobic?!’ We might split up.
BSOMY WIFE THINKS MARRIAGE CAN E ‘CLAUSTROPHOBIC Photo Gallery
Or we might have terriic make-up sex. It’s a 50/50 that many unmarried couples might be prepared to risk: hot jiggy jiggy on one side, freedom on the other. But in marriage, it’s not like that. Especially when you have children. here simply is less freedom (and unless you’re very lucky, probably less jiggy jiggy, too). And you might as well get used to it. All married women eventually discover, like my wife, that while on the plus side he is always there – available for cuddles and comfort, taking out the bins, going downstairs in the middle of the night to see what that mysterious noise was…
On the downside, he is always there – interfering with your stuf, ofering solutions when you don’t want solutions, you just want sympathy, grumbling about getting old, getting in the way… he thing is this: going out with someone is like swimming in a swimming pool. You can jump in and splash about and have a brilliant time, shouting and laughing and gasping for breath, but every now and then you come to the side, where you can put your feet down, have a breather and decide whether to stay in or get out. Being married is like swimming in the sea.
It’s vast and beautiful and swimming pools don’t come close. It gets easier the longer you’re in because, ater all, you can stay aloat even if you hardly paddle at all. But there is no side. here is no getting out. You may get tired, you may get bored, sometimes you may wonder why you ever set of. But you’ve just got to keep on swimming. Yes, even ater you’ve gone all wrinkly.
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