How To Beat An Eating Disorder On Your Own

WHAT DO YOU FEEL WHEN?

When people say or do something mean or hurtful to you, what do you usually feel? Try to describe your physical sensations in your body and the reaction you have.

Think of a recent situation that upset, frustrated, or disappointed you. How did your body experience it? Did you get angry or sad? Did you feel guilty or embarrassed? Is there a way in which you would like to respond differently in the future?

If you are worried about not knowing what you feel, we have found that stopping yourself from engaging in an eating disorder behavior will cause feelings to come up. Whatever they are, and wherever they came from, you can begin there and use the techniques we describe in this Key to work with those feelings.

WHAT FEELINGS COME UP WHEN I INTERRUPT A BEHAVIOR?

The next time you want to engage in an eating disorder behavior, stop yourself from doing it or delay it by setting a timer or doing something to distract yourself. Write about all the feelings that surface when you interrupt the behavior.

When I interrupted my behavior, I noticed these feelings:

IDENTIFYING DIFFICULT FEELINGS

Below is a list offeelings that many of our clients commonly share having difficulty with. They say they are unable to allow themselves to feel the feeling, they berate themselves for feeling it, or the feeling results in negative or destructive behaviors. Read through the list and put a check by the feelings that you find particularly difficult to deal with. Add any others that fit for you, but aren ‘t on the list.

EXPLORING DIFFICULT FEELINGS

From the list of difficult feelings you checked, pick two that are particularly difficult for you right now. Write each feeling and then explore by answering the questions that follow.

Feeling #1:

When is the first time you remember feeling it?

Does a significant memory stand out regarding this feeling?

What do you tell yourself about this feeling or having it?

What are all the things you do in reaction to having this feeling?

Are you afraid of what will actually happen if you experience the feeling, or are you afraid you can ‘ t tolerate or survive feeling it? (Hint: Think offailure as an example.)

What are you afraid others will think (or do) if they know you have this feeling?

How do you think others who have this feeling handle it?

What does it feel like, or where do you feel this in your body?

What are actions you can take to counteract the bodily sensations?

Feeling #2:

Does a significant memory stand out regarding this feeling?

How was (or is) this feeling expressed and responded to in your family?

What does it mean about you to have this feeling?

What do you tell yourself about this feeling or having it?

What are all the things you do in reaction to having this feeling?

Are you afraid of what will actually happen if you experience the feeling, or are you afraid you can’t tolerate or survive feeling it? (Hint: Think offailure as an example.)

What are you afraid others will think (or do) if they know you have this feeling?

How do you think others who have this feeling handle it?

What does it feel like, or where do you feel this in your body?

The more you look directly into rather than avoid feelings you find difficult, the more you will be able to recognize, understand, accept, and handle them. Facing and embracing the difficult feelings allows you to let them go.

The following quote is from a client exploring his feelings around shame:

œMy parents were very strict with us and praised me for self-discipline and taking the hardest road possible. Any digressions for the sake offun, pleasure, self-care, or relaxation were seen as indulgent, lazy, selfish, and evidence I wasn’t a good person and would be punishedfor it down the road somehow. I felt ashamed of my desires, needs, andfeelings. I secretly wanted to have fun andjust lay around sometimes. To this day, if someone comes in and catches me ‘ lying around doing nothing, I feel the shame in my body and I start apologizing and explaining, making sure the person knows I haven’t been there for long. Any pleasure seems to trigger shame in me now. I’m afraid to date because sexual pleasure makes me feel guilty and ashamed even though I know it is normal and even healthy. Then to make it worse, I feel ashamed that I haven’t had a relationship or any experience with sex. I can’t win!

I am working on this in therapy and have learned that my eating disorder helps me deal with my shame. When I deny myself things I want, or have the self-discipline to restrict food and lose weight, it makes me feel that I’m controlling myself from indulgence or pleasure seeking, or from people thinking I’m a selfish person.

I am now starting to see that my eating disorder helps me feel like I’m keeping a shameful, gluttonous self from coming out but at the same time creates shame because I’m ashamed of the behaviors I am doing to myself and what that says about me. 

Like this client, many people go out of their way to avoid, deny, or escape from feeling shame. You can see from the example that having an eating disorder makes things even more complicated because the behaviors themselves can cause shame.

How To Beat An Eating Disorder On Your Own Photo Gallery

Click on Photos for Next How To Beat An Eating Disorder On Your Own Gallery Images


How To Beat An Eating Disorder On Your Own _1.jpgHow To Beat An Eating Disorder On Your Own _26.jpg

2 Responses to “How To Beat An Eating Disorder On Your Own”

  1. April 30, 2017

    alfredolunablog Reply

    How to Beat Your Brain and Succeed

  2. April 30, 2017

    lying_movements Reply

    Still amazes me how many people hate on other’s success. 1 common goal to beat the books, but haters miss that point. Learn 2 love yourself!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *


*